Let’s face it. Dating in 2018 sucks. If you’ve recently fallen out of a long term relationship, I bid you good luck. Like everything else in our lives, dating has become fast, simple and easily replaceable. Apps like Tinder, Hinge, Bumble, Happn and others have put finding a potential partner right at our fingertips.
So how do we use it to achieve success? Depends how you define success: if you want a one-night stand or a Netflix-and-chill partner, you can go ahead and blatantly ask. Otherwise, here is your introductory course to digital dating:
Do - Start The Conversation
Start the conversation. There’s no reason to wait a week after a ‘match’ - be brave and send the first message. Ask a question, or comment about something in their profile that you have . Something in common will always get the conversation flowing and feel the person’s vibe on the other end of your encrypted chat.
Don’t - Say Too Much Too Soon
Some things are better left unsaid. In this case, don’t talk too much about yourself and don’t give away all the “cool” stories, save it for the meet-up. The first few chats should be short and sweet. Once in a while, there comes along someone who you can chat with for four hours into the night - but that’s as rare as a unicorn.
Do - Schedule A Time To Meet
Set a time to meet relatively soon after chatting. Letting it simmer isn’t an option these days. We’re all busy, but don’t wait over a week to meet your Netflix-and-chill prince/princess. Put it on your Google calendar, I dare you.
Don’t - Be Annoying
Do not, I repeat DO NOT be annoying. If this is a broad term, here is an example: Don’t write three messages in a row after no response. Not sure if you’re annoying? Look at your past texts with an ex and see who is writing in full paragraphs? There is your answer. Don’t do it.
Do - Be Responsive
If you see a message and are free, don’t wait three days and 17 hours to reply. There are two reasons to be responsive if you’re actually interested: One, It's annoying to wait. And second, unfortunately online dating is a process of elimination. The faster you reply the faster you can recognize the empty shell of a person you’re talking to and move onto the next prince charming.
Don’t - Send Nudes
DON’T send nudes. Unless you want to spend the rest of your life paranoid that they’ll leak.
Do - Find The Right Place To Meet
Meet at a place where you can sit and hear each other talk. Loud, crowded atmospheres are not a good a setting for a first digital date meetup. Also, alcohol. Get a drink, maybe two. This helps with the awkwardness.
Don’t - Set Expectations
Building up this online person will only disappoint you when they aren’t what you expected. Go in expecting any outcome. Not in a catfishy way, the person behind the keyboard is not the one you will meet.
Do - Be Optimistic
If all else fails, at least you met and learned something new about another person. Sometimes you come across really cool people. Digital dating lets us easily connect to other humans, especially for the introverts out there. Be positive and use the ridiculous experiences as a funny story for your next date.